my inklings review

appu, you have a beautiful mind. i mean i knew you had a good mind, but now i can say with "inklings" as proof that it is what people call a beautiful mind.

if i was gonna write a mail about it, i was gonna do it proprly, better late than never :P

now i'd already told you, "who wrote the rules" was fabulous! simply so! the fucking rules ;-)

"And the sensibility of daylight would make
tonight's words sound as stupid an attempt at humor as a hyena's laugh"
"Why was she stuck in his head like an addictive soundtrack that refused to change?"

excellent! simply excellent! you seem to have an excellent grasp of the psyche of both men and women and that shows in the stories of romance. these lines could not have been written without perfect imagniation!

the revolt of the coconut trees was a very humorous way to put a simple principle in perspective. the credits was just laughwreck!

the stories are perfectly positioned to help the reader imagine, it's a photograph or a scene or a short film

Venus - again the romance aspect has been done beautifully and has come out very naturally, it captures the tension really well. credits again was genius. i somehow felt this was a lot of you, while reading i thought this was from real life, but then that's maybe cos i know u :P

"in a new light" - yes, background noise is a lot like that, isn't it, jarring at times, and blurred at times

"cheekY" - i swear who doesn't feel the same way, some people just have awesome cheeks, i mean u look at their face and it's nothing but cheeks

"always" - tell me the guitar was classic acoustic :P

greenie - excellent name. for once i thought it ended at "Greenie was born in a cauliflower farm.." but i imagined kids in standard 3-4 are people really old enough then to have the boy girl prejudice

crash and die - again i could follow the movement and paint the picture so easily, beautifully done, nice ending

oil on a canvas was also great, that seemed like a great painting.


now, that was just bits and pieces. absolutely loved it, tell me you're coming out with a novel soon, all you need now is some mythology :P dude, on a serious note, ok somewhat serious here, continue this, it's awesome!

three generations

'haveli ki umr saath saal' - The aforementioned proverb is an old hindi one, which means that the life of a palace is 60 years. Sixty years comprising three generations, each generation 20 years. In short, it actually means that prosperity in a family runs for three generations, the first is the entreprenurial, the second manages the establishment and the third wastes it away. I cannot help but feel the person who came up with this didn't have a secret urge to be in the third. I do not abide by this, but it does bring a certain point to the table. Three generations for a peasant is different from the three generations of a worker, specially a white collar indian worker, and different still from the three generations of a an establishment with a 'haveli'.

I am a member of the second generation. I am sure everyone talking about himself thinks of himself as being in the second generation, even the third generation :P Thing is there are different scales at work, the upward scale and the downward scale, the scale of prosperity and the scale of gloom. I will be talking about the upward scale, the road to prosperity, if it were or to a better life, a life with more convenience, a life with less troubles to learn from, or perhaps larger troubles to learn from. My growing up, my ghosts, my limitations, much less severe than the generations before me have been those of the generation before me. But still I find myself puzzled in this quarter life as I am sure many would have including all generations. This is where I shall disuss the troubles of my generation.

Parents of my day or people from the first generation were certainly brought up in a different time. They were brought up with 5 cousins for starters. They were brought up in a country much poorer than today (The Nehruvian economy hadn't still been opened, you see). They were married at an age when I hadn't left college yet and had kids at the age when I had just started to "work". In short they had to take care of a lot more than we did. They did so relentlessely for decades, thinking we, their kids would take up the mantle.

We were a generation up to date with what was going on in the world, better trained to walk at pace with it. We saw a world not limited by making it work, not limited by getting by, not limited by the next step. We wanted it all, and never knew what we wanted. We don't feel like scraping for more anymore. We have enough rest and comfort to value rest, value other musings. These things aren't most natural to us, but we yearn for them to explore them. Yet there is a mantle to be taken, the cruel job of continuing. We want to be the third generation. We want to be the generation that gets it all, because only we have tasted mildly what it feels like. We want to be the kids we envied in a way growing up, yet we want to be outcasts all the same. We want to be the righteous kids as well, the performers, the passive audience, everything. But to do all this, we have to throw the mantle. We thus want to be the third generation, the generation with no mantle to carry.

I agree that whatever was presented was excrutiatingly limited in scope, but purposely so. Every generation gets to be the most advanced generation. Are we supposed to bring something to the table, or leave the table. I guess this is predicament of the second generation.

how has internet changed competition?

We are so aware of the "gazillion" ways in which internet has changed our life - from the paradigm shift in the access of information, to the upheavel of all means of communication, to the way we publish, advertize and inform, and even in the way of meeting people and making friendships. Many may argue over the overlooked pitfalls of this and some may defend this new almost completely egalitarian soceity (unless you're living in china, of course). But I am going to try to point out one of the benefits of the internet which I haven't noticed to be discussed much. On how it has changed competition. This is a direct consequence of the consequence of the global village and the enlarged negihbourhood.

The human brain is limited by the soceity structure, prevailing beliefs and views of its time. It is thus only natural that our performance in any subject or field is affected by the people and the performers around us. The internet provides a much wider base for these thoughts. Two simple examples ought to elucidate this. Every sportsman targets the best, or the world record, or at least the front runner in the race. The best possible is limited by the best. It has been noticed across times that specialists in one field have often come from a region. There is always a city famous for its art pieces, a country for its footballers, another for its technology. One may argue the various reasons to explain this, but it cannot be neglected that the presence of prime competition is one of them.

The internet today gives us the ability to truly know the best in the world. A simple search on the ubiquitous google or youtube will most certainly return prompt results of the best performances in any field. One can not only know who has done it, one can know what exactly has been and in fact see it happen on video (the best form of virtual reality present in abundance today). The boundaries of reality in your mind are stretched at a few keystrokes. In case of the highly popular fields, broadcast media did a fairly good job of showing the best, but with the internet, we have access to amazing performances in various arts, science and sports fields all throughout the world. If there is a new design in local resouce access done in a remote location, other people have access to it. It spreads your universe, broadens the spectrum. A budding fighter can see incredible martial arts experts in the world, or a magician can view tricks he has never imagined before. Artists from different cultures can interact as seamlessely with other artists as they were living in the same locality. The wheel already invented has become so much bigger in scope.

There are numerous examples possible of how we are affected and how we can be in terms of competition, but suffice it to say, that it is one of the few things that directly affects what we do. Our creations are limited by our dreams. We dream bigger when more is possible. With the internet, you can see your neighbour's dream in action, in the neighbourhood of the world.

there will be time, there will be time
you will be mine, you will be mine
there will be shadows int he pale dusk
there will be light in the pale dawn

there will something i can explain
there will be insomnia, gloominess and a state afloat
there will be nothingness and something
nothingness of nothingness
and something of nothingness

peace

finally a simple song

i need to write a song
and i hope now you will sing along
the best songs remain unsung
but my selfish desires stand within
they burn and rage like fire
oh my selfish desire

i can walk and trip along
as i sing and hum along
there's that sparkle in your eye
i so wanna oblige
i am so full of dust
can't you see the beauty in the lust

oh let's go now baby tango
breeze into a world of haze
as the sun dissapears
and moon's singing praise
i would tell you more at once
but lets just dance and that's a must

oh i swear i could be dead
but now i'd rather be alive
the greenery can shed
so i would cry along and cry

oh cmon now don't stop coming
i intend to keep on sucking
at your beauty dear muse
you just have me in a trance
and there is this sweet romance
as i write this truly simple song
all i wanna do is jump and jog

there will be times ahead
as we swing on and fight
let the air around us breathe
as our mirth and joy unite
there is no subtlety in sexuality
now there's no room for more
let the people die and go to hell
as i spring along alone
jump high and overboard,
there is nothing left in sight
you cannot touch my plight
my minds going places and jumping circles
oh if only you could see
that blood and dust unite

bol do na

hum jo baithe hain udhas
gum ki hai barasaat
hum jo baithe hain udhaas
gum ki hai barasaat
bolo main kya karoon
tum naa jo mere paas
hum tum jo naa hain saath
bolo main kya karoon

bol do na, mujhse tum kaho na
ab jo meri saanson mein taraang
baj rahi hai machalti yeh pawan
gaan mein bhi baaje ka umang
roshni jo chede us patang ko

bolon main kya karoon
bolo main kya karoon
bol do

ab humein jaana aur hai
gaana toh bajaana aur hai
gaa ke muskuraana aur hai
bolo main kya karoon

saath hai jashn ka mazaa
thandi thandi chalti woh hawaa
kahan chup gayi hai tu
aa bhi jaa na
sang tu gaa na
phir se jhilmila na

gaaenge phir hum sang sang
motor pe chalegi apni jung
bhaag daud hum machaenge
dhol bin phir hum gaaenge
kahan chup gayi hai tu
aa bhi jaa na

chand pighlega paani mein
raat liptegi jawaani mein
hum tum phir saath gaaenge
paani mein tilmilaaenge
jhoomenge behonsh ho jaaenge

laut aao na
laut aao na
chain se humein sone do na
mar jaane do na
thanda pad jaane do na
silvaton si sisakti is shareer ko thodi shaanti do na...

the shell

the shell is so inviting and safe. it is so much easier to delve into it. it is so much more comfortable to swim in it, alone. it is the only true provider of comfort in this world. no family, parents, siblings, friends can provide what the shell provides, true acceptance, total acceptance, it is like the air and atmosphere in it are made to help you lie down and awake to nothingness. a place where acceptance is complete, a place where the bitch called attention is at rest, a place where there is no need to prove, anything to anyone, a place where even you can be forgiving of yourself for a while.

i love my shell, and i love the walls of my shell. i have a long standing relationship with them. my shell provides me with comfort like no other. well i ain't a glue sniffer. it's just that it's in the air. the shell is where you can be alone, devoid of the world, away from it, there is only you and thus you understands you. there is emptiness, silence, mirth. manic laughter, everything for you, selfish, mindless, numbing, but comfortable is the word, beauty is just a part which never manages to be wholesome. [manic laugh]