Lost Childhood.

the drops dripped away shamelessely as they do and I looked along
They smiled at me with mild contempt and I smiled back
The air reminded me that it has blossomed and I could not embrace it
It took me back and gave me a naughty trailer of what was about to show

And then it began,
the tiny feet splashing in the puddles, much like the one like lie in front of me
i was taken back to my bustling classroom, where i poured from sweat
the shamelessness had left me, and i could only watch
it walk by me and give a friendly smirk

there was once a time i was free, there was once a time no prejudice bound me
the irony is that i am bound by it awareness and my contempt for it
realizing you are in chains and have been trained to be chained does not help

once i was that kid, who lashed out at provocation without lashing out at it
and now i do being helpless each and every while
now i can't jump into that puddle
at times i don't even want to
we change, yes, our needs change, yes
maybe rightly so but why does the fear as well

i, who proudly thought of myself as brave, courageous and fearless
have suddenly been reduced to bits, a tattered image of an illusion
i have cringed when it comes to taking the pain and overcoming the fear
i foolishly thought i was brave when i wasn't afraid

it's funny how the energy to do something cool can let fear not even arise
but it is said that dealing with is the measure,
but going back, i never saw myself change
its almost as if I who never thought that age should be a factor let it change me
why could i not take that jump now
if a school uniform did not stop me, then why this uniform
it's as if this uniform is more binding than the actual uniform
this is the uniform the world gives you to wear

but then i do like to splash
i do it in my mind, it's just that i have lost the tools
made everything up to be an excuse and started to pity myself
i am ultimately the shameless bitch for attention, too shameless
and i can even admit to see the bollywood in that (one brave thing to do)

and i cling on to that hope that i will splash again,
it's tougher to get out of the rat race we are in with ourselves
we live in a world where no one sees us or hears us. tis true
yes it's true, and i could say i love you or i hate you and it wouldn't make a difference

let's see how things unfold.